My Soul Never Felt at Home in England with Marilise de Villiers-Basson- Ep 64
The Relocated South African | Emigration storiesPlay episode
Show notes
In this episode, I sit down with Marilise de Villiers-Basson — TEDx speaker, high-performance coach, founder of Roar Coaching & Consulting, and bestselling author — for one of the most honest and inspiring conversations the show has had.
Marilise grew up in Bredasdorp in the Cape Overberg, studied B Accounting at Stellenbosch University, and qualified as a Chartered Accountant with PwC in Cape Town.
It was during her induction training at PwC that she realised her true calling wasn't in numbers — it was in people. Within three years of qualifying she had become the firm's Training Manager for the Western Cape.
In 2004, mid-20s and newly in love, she gave her now-husband Heini an ultimatum: are you coming or going?
He chose to go — with her — to London. What followed was 18 years of building a career, a family, and a life in England, including 16 years with PwC and a pioneering move into the human side of cyber security, a field she continues to shape today.
But it wasn't all plain sailing. Marilise shares openly about the four-year ordeal of being bullied by a managing director — and the moment she was publicly demoted in a boardroom in front of her entire team. She talks candidly about becoming her own biggest bully in the process, the burnout that followed, and her journey back to herself through physical health, coaching, and eventually, her writing.
Her first book, Roar: How to Tame the Bully Inside and Out, was born out of that experience — and out of the realisation that workplace bullying is a silent epidemic that far too many people suffer alone. Now being republished in South Africa under her own brand, Roar is more relevant than ever.
Then came the decision to return home. COVID shifted everything. Parents were getting older. The boys — born in England — were growing up. And something about South Africa kept pulling them back. In 2023 they moved into their dream barn-style home in Jamestown, just outside Stellenbosch. But re-entry brought its own challenges: reverse culture shock, a second burnout, and the humbling reality of rebuilding a business in a new market.
That experience became the seed of her brand-new book: Moar: How to Play to Win Without Burning Out — a guide to finding your unique "more" and pursuing it with energy, intention, and joy, without losing yourself in the process.
In this episode we cover:
01:18 — Growing up barefoot in Bredasdorp and studying at Stellenbosch University01:55 — Qualifying as a Chartered Accountant and discovering a passion for training at PwC04:46 — Moving to London in 2004 and spending 18 years building a career and family04:58 — Transitioning into cyber security — and why it's fundamentally a people problem06:25 — The brave decision to return to South Africa after 18 years12:37 — Reverse culture shock and the reality of rebuilding life back home17:39 — Four years of workplace bullying and what it taught her about resilience19:55 — Being publicly demoted — and why it was the turning point she needed24:44 — Recovering from burnout and her journey into high-performance coaching28:22 — A second burnout in 2023 — and why she had to "live the curriculum first"31:21 — The new book Moar and what it means to play to win without burning out45:52 — Advice for South Africans thinking about leaving — or coming home
Connect with Marilise:
Website: marilise-de-villiers.comPodcast: Roar for MoreBooks: Roar and Moar — available on Amazon worldwide, Exclusive Books, and Takealot in South Africa
Your documents should not slow down your new life.
Apostil obtains, processes, and couriers South African police clearances, apostille certificates, unabridged documents, and more, directly to your door, anywhere in the world.
Fast, professional, and stress-free. Need your documents sorted?
Visit Apostil here -https://tinyurl.com/apostilcoza
Documents with convenience.
